Sunday Night Movie Marathon

So Sunday evening: eye candy, perve fest (to cheer myself up after the lack of week-end action).

These are the actors / movie characters that make me weak at the knees: Vincent Cassel, Javier Bardem, Dougray Scott (his character in Mission Impossible II makes me quiver …  literally!), Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Dexter (I know … weird!), Josh Brolin in Jonah Hex (yes, even weirder … what can I say? I’m a sucker for complex, scarred men!).

So the evening line up of movies were: Jamón, Jamón and Irréversible.

I was still slightly apprehensive about watching Irreversible though. It is a movie I have been wanting to see since I first heard about it ages ago but I’ve been hesitant, given the crazy reviews and hectic subject: rape.

Apparently, Vincent Cassel’s brother had freaked out so badly when he saw it (Cassel’s real-life partner, Monica Belluci, is his partner and the rape victim in the movie) that, to quote Cassel in an interview with the Guardian, he “stood up in the middle of a screening at the Cannes film festival ... and shouted: 'Gaspar Noe - son of a bitch! We're going to get you!' And he's a rapper. He's supposed to be hard core."

Not surprisingly, after the movie, I felt weird: totally appalled by the graphic rape and murder scenes. But, since the film is shot in reverse sequence, the most recent scene I recalled was the two of them in the bedroom … real lovers, in love, tender, sensual, erotic. So I was kind of aroused too.

I still had to take a really hot bath that night to warm me up, though. I was cold inside from seeing that rape scene. But strangely turned on by the highly charged sexual theme running throughout the movie.

So I went to bed seriously disturbed and veering between wanting straight anonymous, NSA sex, then craving love and intimacy with one person. My dreams were filled with fantasies about passion, sex and lust ... bordering on love …

And I don’t think I need an analyst to tell me what my dream last night meant:

I was with my ex (the most recent one – from France). But we were meeting up as “Friends With Benefits”. So we were in bed together. But not as a couple. Merely as … lovers.

Yes. I woke up feeling decidedly wonky.

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